Dark humor about death, illness, depression, and tragedy can seem wrong and disturbing, but there is some evidence that it can be an important part of the healing process for some people.
Humor can play a very important yet under-appreciated role in our mental health and well-being.
In general, the ability to take any experience in life and put a humorous spin on it is a great habit to learn. It takes the “good” in life and makes it infinitely more enjoyable. It can also take the “bad” in life and help you to accept and digest those painful experiences you have gone through.
Dark humor about topics like death, illness, depression, or other tragic experiences in life may be one of the most important types of humor to cultivate.
According to one study published in Cognitive Processing, people who appreciate a dark sense of humor were also shown to be more intelligent, more emotionally stable, and less aggressive overall.
Often we may think those who enjoy dark humor have something terribly wrong with them. After all, what type of person appreciates jokes about death or illness or depression?
However, the truth is life can be filled with negativity and unfortunate events that can be hard to cope with, and humor can be one amazing tool for us to move past these experiences, change our perspective, and take some control over them.
From my personal experience, I often find that those who can be the funniest people in life are also those who have gone through a lot of shit in life. This seems to be common among a lot of popular comedians who struggle with mental illness or personal tragedy.
A fascinating article published in The Atlantic discussed the potential therapeutic benefits of “suicide memes.” They spoke to psychologist Bart Andrews who serves on the executive board of the American Association of Suicidology, and he states that:
- “When you read the threads on these [suicide] memes, people find them helpful. They don’t feel alone. It’s a way for them to anonymously communicate their inner pain in a way that’s artistic, super clever, and that people who are struggling identify with.”
I found this to be an excellent example of how dark humor can potentially help people. Humor often empowers people to talk about sensitive and serious subjects in a way that’s not always easy or natural.
Instead of being completely silent on these negative feelings, memes and dark humor give people an outlet to express themselves without worrying too much about judgments from others.
One big aspect of mental health is that we must give ourselves permission to be negative every now and then, and learning to channel our dark side in a healthy way is important for becoming a fully developed human being.
There’s likely no better way to accept and embrace these negative sides of life than with a hint of humor and laughter.
Dark Humor as Reframing
Humor is a type of reframing (or “cognitive restructuring”). It takes an experience and puts a twist on it so that we experience it in a completely new way.
Most humor involves taking something in life and looking at it from a different perspective. By doing this, we can often change the meaning of something (or add another layer to it) without changing the reality behind the situation.
One new study published in Brain and Behavior found that humor can be an important way to regulate our emotions, especially in those with depression or mental health issues. Researchers found that the use of humor was associated with decreased negative emotions, increased positive emotions, and helped people to distance themselves from adversity and hardship.
I remember the first time I attended a funeral at a very young age. One of the best friends of the deceased was cracking jokes about how the body looked like an alien. At the time, I was confused and disturbed by the comments. But looking back on this experience now I can see that this was a way for the friend to cope with the loss and digest the experience during a very stressful and difficult time.
Of course, it’s important to remember that “dark humor” isn’t always appropriate for everyone. In the wrong context, it may come off as incredibly offensive, disturbing, and insensitive.
The difference between a “good joke” and a “bad joke” often depends on the people you are with and the context of the situation.
This is why it’s important to have avenues to express dark humor. I only let out my true “dark humor” side around close friends who know how my sense of humor can get sometimes.
The internet is another great way to find places to enjoy dark humor with others. The anonymity of the online world can often allow us to express our thoughts and feelings in a healthy way without fearing judgment from others.
Another interesting study published in Personality and Individual Differences found that “self-defeating humor” can promote psychological well-being and increase sociability among others.
Poking fun at yourself in a healthy way can be a great way to reframe your flaws and shortcomings into something to laugh about. When a person makes fun of themselves (or at least has the ability to laugh at themselves), it shows they don’t take themselves too seriously, and that can make them much more likable to others.
Someone who is able to laugh at themselves is often way more enjoyable to be around than someone who always takes themselves too seriously and needs to feel perfect all the time. By putting a humorous spin on your flaws, you show others that you are human and imperfect – and you can laugh about it.
Humor is an important tool for improving our mental health in any given situation. But I’d also like to point out that we should be careful not to use it as a crutch. Some people need to joke about everything and can never be sincere or authentic.
Sometimes instead of using humor as a way to express oneself, people use humor and sarcasm as a way to hide their true feelings. There’s a balance in how much we should use humor and it’s important to be mindful of how we are using it.
Like all tools, dark humor can be incredibly powerful and therapeutic, but it has a time and place and it’s important that we use it wisely.
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