Sharing New Experiences is the Bedrock of All Healthy Long-Term Relationships

Every relationship is a story and every story needs different chapters.

For many long-term relationships, the big challenge is being able to keep creating new chapters rather than getting stuck re-living the old ones. This means keeping things fresh and stimulating, and not falling into the trap of stagnation and boredom.

If a couple is always following the same routine every day – wake up, have breakfast, go to work, come home, watch TV, go to sleep – then they may start to get the feeling that they’ve stopped growing and stopped moving forward as a relationship.

At that point a relationship can still survive, but there’s also the risk that people will slowly grow sick of each other, or perhaps even look for alternatives to keep their lives interesting. Every relationship needs to find its balance between being familiar and comfortable, while also being novel and exciting.

This is why sharing new experiences is the bedrock of all healthy long-term relationships.

No matter how old your relationship is with someone you can always find new things to explore together and experience together. And the more memories you build with someone, the deeper and more meaningful that relationship becomes.

This is because the more you experience with someone, the more chapters you add to your relationship’s story. And as that story grows and expands, you can look back on those memories and be reminded of the strong and unique connection between you and the other person.

This is true for virtually any type of relationship, whether it’s with a loved one, a friend, a family member, or coworker.

For example, have you ever ran into an old friend from childhood who you share a long and rich history with? It’s often incredibly easy to re-spark that friendship simply by reminiscing on all the “good times” you had over the years.

When you build a long history of new experiences with someone, that relationship often sticks with you for the rest of your life.

It’s not difficult to find new experiences to share with someone, you just have to both be open to trying new things for the sake of trying new things.

In one interesting study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family, researchers discovered that when couples simply attended an art class or played a board game together, they released oxytocin (which is a hormone in the body often associated with love and bonding).

That’s just one simple example of how engaging in new activities together can play a huge role in building a stronger connection with someone.

There are many different possibilities for keeping your relationship fresh and interesting. Here are a few quick examples of positive experiences you can share with your partner:

• Try out new restaurants together.
• Visit museums, art galleries, and historical monuments.
• Attend a class together (such as a dance class, art class, or learning a new skill).
• Travel to new places together.
• Practice cooking a new meal together.
• Go to concerts to check out new bands.
• Go on hikes or nature walks together.
• Collaborate on an art project.
• Start a movie marathon on rest days (such as only “Western” movies or “Horror” movies).
• Join a sports league together (bowling, tennis, softball, etc.)
• Read the same book together.
• Watch the sunset on a beach.
• Take a romantic bath together.
• Have a board game night.
• Work on home improvement/D.I.Y. projects together.
• Go skydiving together.
• Take turns giving each other massages.
• Have friends over for dinner or a weekend party.
• Do a puzzle together.
• Go on a road trip together.
• Start a campfire in your yard and roast marshmallows.

Most of these suggestions are simple and easy. You don’t need to do anything extraordinary to keep your relationship fresh and interesting. It’s often the little things that can turn into something special over-time.

The important thing is to always be looking for new experiences to share with your partner, whether big or small.

Even just putting a unique twist on ordinary experiences, like eating popcorn with chopsticks, turning chores into a friendly competition, or role-playing different characters in bed, is a great way to keep things fun and exciting.

Ideally, you want to create experiences that you can one day look back on and say, “Remember that time we…?” And then it brings a smile to your face or you have a good laugh about it. Those are the moments that create real meaning in our lives.

Every relationship needs to offer opportunities for individuals to explore, grow, and improve with one another. And the best way to do that is to continue to seek new experiences to share – and continue to build onto your relationship’s story.

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